Thursday, June 30, 2011

Where Sasquatch Really Come From

It had been a long day and it was barely six in the evening. I had already been up for over 12 hours and a jam packed 12 hours they had been. It started with setting up and then holding my first yard sale from which we went immediately into the season's last T-ball and Coach pitch games. From there a hurried hour drive took us to a baby shower for my niece Katie, who is expecting her first bundle of boy in September.

After basking in Katie's pregnant glow and gorging ourselves with lemon bars & various brownies, we pulled back onto I-15 to make our way home with a clear docket for the rest of the night. With the radio playing some of our favorite songs we settled in for the ride and I found myself lost in the hypnotic turning of the wheels when from behind me a chant began,

"PU-BER-TY! PU-BER-TY! PU-BER-TY!

At first, I wondered if I was so tired that I might actually be dreaming, but after stretching and shifting in my seat, the chant continued,

"PU-BER-TY! PU-BER-TY! PU-BER-TY!"

I concluded I was very much awake.

My next thought went to the possibility of the 5 Hour Energy shot I downed earlier and the Diet Coke I was currently sipping had created an overload of caffeine and was causing some sort of auditory hallucination. Because really, how would my almost seven year old know the word puberty? And why, in heaven and earth, would he be chanting it?

Certain my ears were deceiving me, I turned to Ashton sitting in the passenger seat wearing an amused look on his face as he shattered my theory.

"You know he's chanting puberty..."

Figuring I had to say something I decided on the blunt facts.

"Ben, you don't even know what puberty is."

The chanting ceased. Silence ensued. Wonderful, non-questioning silence.

Until Dallin in the far back decided to chime in.

"What is puberty, Mom?"

My mind shifted into high gear as I noticed Ashton stiffen a little in the seat next to me.

I decide to go with blunt facts again.

"It's when between the ages of 11-14 when your voice gets deeper and you start growing hair on your face, under arms and swimsuit area."

Agonizing groans erupt from the very back seat.

"Oh, NO! That should be illegal!"

Laughter from Ashton beside me.

Ben innocently asks, "So puberty is all about hair?"

Dallin, having suddenly become an expert, answers with, "Yep! Hair, hair, EVERYWHERE! Puberty pretty much changes you into a Sasquatch."

I turn the radio up a little louder and figure that would suffice....at least, for now.

Monday, June 27, 2011

Homecoming

I heard the keys in the door shortly after 8:00 a.m. I ran down the stairs and threw the bolt back. There, after spending a week in a typhoon and tropical storm ravaged Philippines, stood Richard- exhausted, jet lagged, and wanting nothing more than to go to bed. But there were the little people. Little people who had a week full of adventures to fill daddy in on. Little people who talk a mile-a-minute and crawl all over daddy like a jungle gym. Little people simply bursting with excitement that daddy is home.

I think it wore them both out.

I'm so glad when Daddy comes home
Glad as I can be
Clap my hands and shout for joy
And climb upon his knee.
Put my arms around his neck,
hug him tight like this.
Pat his cheek and give him what?
A great big... NAP!

Thursday, June 16, 2011

A Few More...

Just a couple of Kid-isms that recently happened and one that I forgot in the last batch.


Ben- "I wish I had really long, puffy hair."
Me- Why in the world would you want really long, puffy hair?"
Ben- "Cause then I'd have a built in pillow."


Ben trying out what really long, puffy hair would be like with Richard's travel pillow.


A conversation with Dallin after he listened to me tell a neighbor about a time Ashton got lost and I thought he'd been kidnapped.
Dallin- "I remember when that happened. I must have been really little, but I still remember it."
Me- "Sorry, dude, you weren't born yet. You were still in my tummy."
Dallin- "Well, then I must have been watching through your belly button 'cause I remember it!"



A bit of info you need to know about this next one- I am not a fan of the really tight T-shirt trend. They are all well and fine if you have the figure to wear them, which about 90% of the population do not- including myself. I don't really want to look at my own rolls and bulges and figure that more than likely, no one else does either. So the majority of my shirts are loose and probably unfashionable, but I don't care. The other day I pulled out my flag T-shirt to try on; it's one of the clingier shirts I own, but I was feeling pretty bulge free and thought it was loose enough to get away with .

I thought wrong.... according to Emma.

Emma- (While patting my tummy) "You look like you're going to have a baby!"
Me- "Are you saying I'm fat?"
Emma- "Yep, really, REALLY fat!

I guess I need some more core work and a new flag shirt.

Or perhaps just a new daughter.

 Just kidding...kind of. ;)

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Kid-isms

If you are reading this then my gamble was successful. I have been experiencing technical difficulties with my computer that involve weird noises and smoke! Obviously, I have been hesitant to use it, and have been using my e-reader for the majority of my electronic communication. But, as amazing as it is, it can't do everything (or at least very well) so if I successfully post these few kid-isms you'll know that my computer worked without creating a campfire in my lap!

Yeah, I'm still going to have it checked out. Sorry, no smores for you.

Dallin Said...

"We had a substitute in library today, so we went outside and drew pictures with sidewalk chalk. But she wouldn't let us write words- not even Jimmer or BYU, so I just drew a bunny with 2 chainsaws."


"Dad, did they even have cars in Spain when you were on your mission?"

"Mom, I need a picture of myself to put in my room."

Ben-isms

While hiking up the mountain on the trail to the 'Y'- "Why don't they get rid of all these rocks?"


*Singing what he learned in Primary* "Praise to the Man who commuted with Jehovah..."

Emma's Three Sense


"I think Daddy should be the prophet when he grows up....no, no, the ice cream man!"

Emma: "Have you always been a mommy?"
Me: "No. I became a mommy after I grew up and married daddy."
Emma: "And then you moved here and I came to your porch?"
In my head- "Yeah, something like that. Something just like that...